Posted in Blast to the Past, Church, Humour, People

Job is a brat! (They didn’t tell us that…)

Catherine has been reading through the book of JOB for her recent quiet times and we have had some interesting discussions around the character of Job.

Job is whining idiot!  (Yes, you just read that correctly!)

IN THE OLD DAYS:

– I heard many a sermon preach on how faithful JOB was to God.
– Are they serious, the preachers who preached that message?
– Job, is pitiful.
– He moans and feels sorry for himself and curses the very day he was born.
– And we were told. Be like Job.

(Did preachers, really believe – that was the message?!)

– I was taught, his friends who were babbling fools giving insensitive advice.

BUT WHAT IS THE ACTUAL LESSON:

– The friends, actually, speak wisdom to Job. They call it as it is. (We all need friends like that.

– Maybe, the lesson from the book is – do not whine like JOB? Seriously, when last have you read that BOOK? It’s painful to hear all his sulking.

– The best part of that book is when God speaks to Job in chapter 38 with a serious of questions. That simply puts things in perspective.

– God is God. His ways are higher than ours.

Question – How will you respond when the poo hits the fan?

Job – he didn’t too well. But how would you and I respond?

(I could expound more on the book of Job, but right now, it’s late, and my day is full tomorrow.  Good Night world!)

Posted in Humour, Inspirational

(A piece) Looking for the “likes”

Attention!
Attention please?
LIKE
Aaah, that’s better…

I was trying to think of something clever to say
LIKE
I don’t mind if you read my status
Or notice my tweets (or if you don’t)
LIKE
(Yes!!! Got another like…)

I’m free from caring what you think?
UNLIKE
(Hey, have you liked my post yet?)
LIKE

I am not addicted to social media
LIKE
(I glance at my mobile for the 50th time…)
49 LIKES
(So, is this what fame feels like?)

“I’m eating a hand sandwich”
(It’s a really nice one,)
“That awkward moment…”
(I’m actually posting about someone in particular but I’m just making it “generalized” but you know…)

Uploading…
Posting…
Sharing…
Done!

download

LIKE
Oh it’s my mom…

If we’re honest with ourselves
We all are a little addicted to the attention
LIKE it or not…

PS. You better LIKE this post! 😉

 

Posted in Humour, Inspirational

Where’s my cow? (A lesson from Terry Pratchett)

I’m enjoying my first book by this author.

Discworld is a great place to discover. 

Prarchett’s humour is brilliant, classy and odd…

It’s funny… the places we discover life lessons:

So to set the seen: Sam Vimes needs to be home at six.  His fellow officer creates traffic jams in the city to help the chief of The Watch get home on time. Why?

“Six o’clock,  prompt. Every day. Read to Young Sam. No excuses. He’d promised himself that. No excuses.No excuses at all. Once you had a good excuse, you opened the door to bad excuses.”

How profound is that? 

He would always make that time to read to his child. There are certain ‘rituals’ or moments that one must always treasure…

No excuses! How often have we let in excuses in the past…? It’s stops now. No excuses!

And detective Vimes experiences something:”…but here in this quiet time…he never knew what to say. He was tongue-tied in the presence of a fourteen-month-old baby.”

So beautiful. 

P.S. where’s my cow? Is the title of the story he reads to his son.

Posted in Church, Faith, Humour, Inspirational

The day I appeared in the newspaper

Last week, I had to honour of making an appearance in the local newspaper, The Bulletin here in Secunda.

20160415_080114

Funny thing, the lady who cleans our church, told me when she saw my picture, she thought I had died (thankfully not yet) – apparently people appear in the paper when they have passed on…

Honoured:

– I’m not a resident of Secunda, (well, I’m not from here, originally) and it’s humbling to get a piece written about me.

– I’ve read some of the other “human interest” stories – and they’re amazing.

But, be that as it may… I hope God would use my story in some way…

The day, the paper was printed I got two calls about recycling.  I also got a massive thank you from the Sizithande Recycle Centre – so that’s helped our relationship/connection too.

I wasn’t entirely sure what the focus was of the article was;

  1. i) If geocaching, were a religion – it got good exposure…
  2. ii) The church I worked for – got mentioned – who knows that bring some exposure for them

iii) The recycling project – I started has done so well.  And that definitely got exposure… One of my expressions as a follower of God is to care for His world.

(I don’t know how someone can say that love God and life He gives and yet destroy / and not care for His world.  Litter irks me immensely!)

Funniest, the day that I appeared in the paper – as I cycled to the shop later…  I kept wondering if people were thinking and pointing at me “Isn’t that the guy from the paper?”

Thankfully not! 😉

So Creator God, thank you for the opportunity.

(I’m sure there is a book called: 101 things to do before you die… being in a newspaper… may be done of them.  Check.)

Over and out…

Posted in Church, Humour

(Repeat a few times)

I like laughing at the little idiosyncrasies of church.
Because they do pop up every so often 😉

So this morning a set of song word’s had the instruction “repeat a few times” displayed in (brackets) after one of the choruses:

Seriously?
Is that not an instruction for the Data Projector person?
Or can not the worship leader be the one that leads the church in the song?

Whether the line is repeated once or a few times…having that instruction displayed is rather comical.

It’s like an idiot’s guide to singing 😉

Posted in Humour, People

whatsapp woes

(I have an odd sense of humour. Please don’t read too seriously into this blog. I am not being racist or emo or whatever. Just tongue in cheek!)

And I have to share… because I want to:

So in South Africa, the black folk are known for their community. Community comes natural. They’re good at welcoming others. It goes with the whole philosophy:

umuntu ngumuntu ngabantu” – a person is a person because of others. I love that!

But the funniest thing is black folk on whatsapp groups. It’s like “double community” oh my word!

I joined a study group for one of my UNISA subjects; I had to leave it… there was just way too much chatting going on… lol.

Like an overdose of community! Yesterday I started this local group in my town for those interested in playing soccer. I leave my phone for awhile and then come back to a 45 unread messages in that group. Oh my!

so that’s my one random observation!
—-

then I must laugh at the “bizarre” loneliness one feels… when you’re the only one “left” in a whatsapp group. Recently, family and friends made little groups for recent events. (easier chatting in one group.)

But once the events have expired.. people leave the group. I keep forgetting to delete the groups. I then stumble upon them by accident and discover I’m the only one left. haha!
I feel a surge of “loneliness” over me… haha! Bizarre!

I know… #odd thoughts over and out…

Posted in Church, Humour

How does one with ADD survive a church service? Part I

Sometimes a church service can go on for sooo looong…
How does one with ADD survive?
Do we really need to sing the bridge of Oceans over and over and over and over?

If songs are too long…
If minister is not capturing your attention…

Here are two simple tips to get you started:

1) Count the amount of chairs in the church building. That may kill sometime.

2) Watch a roaming toddler in church. To see them climbing over and under things, stumbling around with utter fascination is rather entertaining. (And who knows you may just learn something from that?) – Child like wonder… I believe they call it…

Posted in Humour

Stolen words

I love words.

I love scrabble.

Recently I ordered this great looking game from Groupon

scrabble-trickster

But after the promised 48 hour delivery period; the game had still not arrived.
So I call Groupon yesterday and inquired why my order had not arrived yet.
They went on to say that the delivery van was unfortunately hijacked (another day in Africa) and my game was among the many things stolen.

I told Catherine about this incident and she cleverly replied:

“I guess they took your words away then. ;)”

Speechless!

Posted in Humour, People

The unspoken law of gift bags

Dear wrapping paper,

We used to be friends
We ‘covered’ a lot of ground.
But sometimes we did get into ‘sticky’ situations…

So I had to move on.
It’s not you.
It’s me.
I’ve changed.

Dear Gift Bags,
You ‘carry’ the best intentions and idea.
You’ve won me over.
You’re so convenient.

I’ve noticed an unspoken law in your relationship with others.
No one writes on ur label/tag.
That’s brilliant!
So when u arrive in our lives..
We can pass u on
Like good news! 🙂

So gift bag, you rock my world bringing ‘good things’ but you’re not needy or high maintenance.
You allow me to move you on…

All my love,

Mr Gift Purchaser 🙂

Posted in Church, Faith, Humour

I would do a Youth Rally differently

I would do a Youth Rally differently
24 November 2014

In my last two and a half years up on the hill I have been to a few youth rallies. Generally, they’ve been pretty good. A quality band. And good topics.
But they’ve been too “samey” if I can use that as a word.

Every time there is loud music, flashing lights, dramatic talk, someone plays “mood music” on the keys behind as the talk winds down to the altar call. The teen’s emotions are at an all-time high. “Let’s grab them now for Jesus.” Then we lead them into the “salvation prayer” and then we end the session with one or two amping songs again… usually: O Happy Day!

Then the next event, comes around… and then teen who previously gave their life, hears the message, and feels they need to give their life again… and again…
But perhaps we’re toying with their emotions???

Then the guest speaker generally seems to be of the same genre or profile.
They’re successful. They have it altogether. They dress like a hipster, skinnies and the checkered shirt and some trendy rims…
They have a beautiful girlfriend or wife, and life is just so “grand” for them.

It makes me wonder for the misfit teens. The ones that live in shitty circumstances. Where their self-confidence is barely hanging on. Their parents barely make ends meet. They spend the entire week “preparing” themselves to face the massive crowd at the rally. Will she notice me? Will what I wear, be fine?

And the speaker represents success. And that misfit teen… feels so disconnected…

I would do things differently.

The band doesn’t always need to be high profile and flashy. Because sometimes we tend to worship the worship and not the One we’re supposed to be there for…

Perhaps, encourage teens to be still and listen. We’re always making Jesus so LOUD!!!
Could He not be speaking in the quiet?

Then the person upfront. Let’s get someone who doesn’t have it altogether.
Someone who admits they feel insecure. Or that they feel hurt by life’s circumstances. Someone who is not entirely “popular” but simply points the youngsters to Jesus.
(Hear me out, I’m not saying… the speakers I’ve heard haven’t done that. I’m just asking for a change…)

Then after the message has been delivered; DON’T DO AN ALTAR CALL!!!
Yes, you read that correctly. This is how I would do the response time:

“So tonight you’ve heard about Jesus.
You’ve possibly felt His presence here in this place.
You’ve seen around you how others have been able to sing to this God that seems so close to them.
And you may want in on that.

But can I ask you to do this. To wait after the HYPE and EMOTION of tonight has gone.
When you’re at home… before you sleep. On your own. Think about what was said and sung tonight.

If you’re serious about having a relationship with Jesus… then ask Him then and there.
And when you have. The next day, tell a friend or youth leader and / or your parents.
Then the decision you make won’t be made just out of emotion.”

I’d like to hear something along those lines for a change…

One last thing. This is erroneous. We ALWAYS “invite” God to be with us in that place: where we’re singing…
That makes it sound like God is only in some places. That God has fallen into a slumber in the heavens and we need to wake Him and remind Him to attend the youth rally.

Could we not prayer in more theologically correct way?
“God, you are everywhere. You’re in this place. Open our minds and hearts to see and know that truth.”

Now, that resonates with me. Amen

—————–

A secret location